Popular Singer and entertainer Tina Turner had a significant number of hit songs. Her most recognizable song was entitled “Proud Mary.” However, another popular tune was entitled, “What’s Love Got To Do With It?” The premise of the song is an anti-love song about a woman that doesn’t feel emotionally connected to her partner. The song expresses distrust of love and emotion. The refrain of the song states, “What’s love got to do, got to do with it? What’s love but a second-hand emotion?What’s love got to do, got to do with it? Who needs a heart when a heart can be broken?” I believe if we live long enough, we all can experience a “broken heart.” For whatever reason, people can be motivated to emotionally wound another or we can lose someone or something that is heart breaking. Think of all the broken-hearted people who lost everything in the California wildfires. In another verse of the song love is dismissed as a “sweet old-fashioned notion.” In essence the song is saying true love doesn’t really exist. It’s the stuff of soap operas and Hallmark movies. I suspect some of the motivation for Tina Turner’s song stems from her volatile marriage to Ike Turner. Tina’s husband was very verbally, physically and emotionally abusive towards her. She eventually divorced him and went on to a solo career becoming one of the most well-respected powerhouses in the music industry.
What Is True Love?
How do we define true love? Television and the movie industry certainly have their pre-conceived notions. “True love” according to Hollywood always has a happy ending. The happy couple after some challenges rides off into the sunset at the end. There was also a movie many years ago, that came out in 1970 entitled, “Love Story” which starred Ryan O’Neil and Ali McGraw. The story follows a couple who were madly in love then experience tragedy when Ali McGraw’s character becomes seriously ill with cancer and dies. The classic line from the film was, “Love means never having to say you’re sorry.” Really? Never expressing sorrow for anything you’ve done if you truly love someone? In my years as a counselor, a line like that would not be helpful in building a strong relationship! Then of course there’s the day that will be celebrated across the country on February 14th, which is Valentine’s Day. Yes, the day of hearts, flowers, candy and don’t forget the card with all the special words of devotion to that special someone. There are various historical stories that explain the origins of Valentine’s Day. Some say it honors a man named Valentine who was martyred because he helped persecuted Christians during the reign of the Roman Emperor Claudius II. Other historians suggest that Christians placed Valentine’s Day in the middle of February to Christianize the pagan Lupercalia Festival that took place on February 15th which celebrated fertility. The pagan festival was finally outlawed in the 5th century by Pope Gelasius but it wasn’t until the Middle Ages that Valentine’s Day began to be associated with love. However, there is a painful reality for many people on Valentine’s Day. There are those whose spouses have passed away. There are those who have never had the opportunity to be in a loving relationship. There are some who carry the pain of sexual or physical abuse by a so-called “parent” who was supposed to love and take care of them. There are women who are living in a domestic violence situation. It’s folks from various situations like these who like Tina Turner can ask the question, “what’s love got to do with it?”
How Does the Bible Define Love?
What does the Bible have to say about love? How does the Bible define real love? When I was in seminary, one of the professors asked our class, “How do you know God loves you?” There was a silence in the room as we students looked at each other to see who would be brave enough to answer first. I believe many of us, myself included were thinking there must have been some deep theological answer the professor was looking for, after all weren’t we in seminary? After a few seconds of awkward silence, the professor responded with four simple words, “Look at the cross.” Yes, the cross! The symbol of death and torture that reflects the definition of true love with the death of Jesus Christ. Romans 5:8 states, “But God shows His love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” (NIV) How many of us would willingly die for someone we think didn’t deserve it? Many parents would say that they would lay down their life for their children or a spouse. Some would even sacrifice their lives for someone they truly loved or cared about. How about giving up your life for a thief? Or a murderer? Or a crooked politician? Or a drug addict? We most likely would hesitate or think twice about sacrificing our lives for “those” kind of people. Guess what? Jesus didn’t hesitate or think twice. He gave up His life for all people. John 15:13 states, “Greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends.” (NIV) How about this familiar verse, John 3:16, “For God so loved the world that He gave His One and Only Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life.” (NIV) God’s love does not depend on your race, your social status, your good works, your successes or your failures. “God is love” according to 1 John 4:8. His love is unconditional. He cannot help but love because that is the very nature of who He is and God doesn’t change. Our love as human beings tends to be conditional. If you do this, I’ll do that. If you follow through, keep all your promises, and never disappoint me, then I will love you. If you don’t live up to my expectations, then I will no longer love you as a friend. If your hair turns gray too early or you put on some weight then I will take my love from you, get a divorce and find a more attractive partner. The Bible says that love was never our idea in the first place, 1 John 4:19 states, “We love because He first loved us.” (NIV) Contrary to the popular idea that we often hear that love is a feeling, which it is, love is so much more. Remember feelings come and go but true love that is rooted in Christ, manifests as a commitment to another regardless of what takes place. Whether that person is happy, sad, or angry. Whether that person is physically healthy or seriously ill. Whether that person is emotionally struggling or at peace. Placing someone else’s best interest above our own demonstrates God’s heart for humanity. God loves you simply because you exist. After all He created you out of love and for His pleasure, placing you on this earth at this particular time in history. You don’t have to work for His affection. You don’t have to set yourself straight before God can pour out His love over you. How opposite is God’s love to what humanity defines as love!
Perfect Love Is Found In Christ
What’s love got to do with it? Everything! The Bible from Genesis to Revelation is God’s love letter to humanity. It is a letter that speaks of a sacrificial love that didn’t say only the so-called “good people” were worth dying for or the most popular, rich, or attractive get to heaven. The Bible is the narrative of how humanity betrayed, rejected, disobeyed and time and time again ignored the God who created the heavens and the earth and gave life to all created things including you and me. Yet, God didn’t reject us but gave us the biggest valentine that nothing on earth could match. It didn’t come in the form of a bouquet of flowers, it didn’t come in a box of chocolates, or even a card expressing loving words. Yes, God’s valentine is in the shape of a heart and red in color but it is the color of blood that flows from the heart of a Savior who willingly hung on a cross as His very life flowed from His body. Jesus in His life on earth demonstrated the Father’s love for humanity and He expected those who committed their lives to follow after Him to show that same love to others. He told His disciples in John 13:34-35, “A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this everyone will know that you are My disciples, if you love one another.” (NIV) The love that Jesus is calling His disciples to is not the fleeting warm fuzzies but rather an unconditional, sacrificial kind of love. The qualities of love that God defines are laid out in 1 Corinthians 13:4-8, “Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails.” (NIV) Can we honestly say we love that perfectly? I know I can’t but God can and God does. Moreover the even greater blessing is that nothing can separate us from God’s love. Paul states in Romans 8:38, For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present or the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.” (NIV) We can fully trust God’s love for us and emotionally entrust our hearts to Him. So before we get all tangled up in the temporary, conditional expectations of love that are a part of Valentine’s Day, let’s remember what true love actually looks like, to believe in the love God has given us in His Son, Jesus Christ and to reflect that to others. 1 John 3:23 states, “And this is His command: to believe in the name of His Son, Jesus Christ, and to love one another as He commanded us.” (NIV) Valentine’s Day is just one day we are given on the calendar to celebrate love but the love of God is 24/7 365 days of the year and it is a love that has no end. So, let’s choose to make Jesus the “valentine” of our hearts.
Peace in Christ,
Pastor Sheree
